Late idea

So thats it, a long day, lots done, nice things to eat, good telly. Perfectly ready for the sleepings. A quick flick through the very comforting National Geographic and lights off to muse over vague thoughts of the problems with the oil sands of Canada. Just right.

Zzzzzzzz

Then, “wouldn’t it be funny if, in the show, I did this thing with jars and celotape, Indana Jones and islands in the stream. Maybe long hands on stick. Yeah, long hands!”

Fucked. The rest of the night is a cholera fever of Edinburgh madness, all Steve Bennet and portaloos – plastic pints and anxiety - rated in stars.

And the dreadful thing is the older I get this insomnia just gets worse.

A THREE HANDER EXTRAVAGANZA


Featuring sketch comedy from ANNA & KATY (Penny Spubbs / lead Balloon / Not Going out / Torchwood). Stand up of the good kind from the powerfully meant JOE WILKINSON ( two episodes of mash / height & beauty) and brand new sketch comedy from WILLIAM ANDREWS (BAFTA winner / Will & Greg / mousey blond)
7:30 for 8:00 6/7


Back to the weedge

Tonight is pretty much the last time we are going to do "will and greg; a sketch show" although we said that at the last sketchatron. Basically sketch performers are not to be trusted. thats what i'm saying. If you are in glasgow and you are one of the two who reads this then come. Not the peodo one though, you should stay at home, handcuffed to a radiator.

Oh and if anyone is thinking of breaking into my house then don't. I have a series of traps set up al la "home alone" - including a cut out of a basketball player going around the living room on a train set.

ISN'T STANDUP FUN

You know the woman at the station who announces the train times and platforms? Do you think she speaks like that at home! “the next dinner to arrive at the table with be the dinner, pie!” HA HA HA
And what about the coroner at the kids hospital? When he gets home does he find it hard to connect in increasingly basic ways with a world which makes less and less sense to him.

MELONDRAMA

He said to me “do I scare you?” I nodded. “Is it the scars on my face?” I shrugged. “Don’t judge me on the way I look” he said. “I’m a good guy. Everyone likes me”. I looked at the floor. “I’m not judging you on the way you look but not everyone likes you. Someone didn’t like you with a knife. Or they didn’t like your cheeks. Either way, please get out of my bedroom and take the dog with you. “

The persuasive power of facial hair.

Have you seen this yet?
I don’t have a cervix. I wouldn’t describe myself as being “cervix savvy”. If I did have a cervix then I remain unconvinced that that man’s face that would inspire me to discover more about it. “It” being my cervix (imagined).

I find that face, beside those words, wrong. The phrase “What were they thinking?” trips of the tongue. A little investigation and a trip to their web site http://www.becervixsavvy.co.uk/ uncovers this.

I could go on about why i think this is fucked, but i don't need to right? I don't do i? I mean i don't right?
Have a look at the web site - especially the "advert in the making".